NEBULA NINE. Test 4.

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Durand
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NEBULA NINE. Test 4.

Post by Durand »

Hello, I've done another test. I am still wrestling with the character design.
This sequence has a classic Bug Eyed Monster. This shot is brief, 8 Sec's.
Please take a look and tell me what you think. Thanks.
http://vimeo.com/12783676
sbtamu
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Post by sbtamu »

I really can't see anything wrong with it, The audio is fine and so is the video, the blurs are good. Bring it on, lets see the rest. Nothing really to crit on this, It's actually good!!!
Sorry for bad animation

http://www.youtube.com/user/sbtamu
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neeters_guy
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Post by neeters_guy »

I like it! I'm a sucker for a pretty heroine.
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hothead
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Post by hothead »

i think you shoud zoom out the camera abit it take me about 7 replay to understand what was going on.

i cant say if its funny or not as Selgin said i should not use the F word to make my point clear.. :D
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fracturedray
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Post by fracturedray »

I think the animation is really great.

I have two comments but the second one is more personal taste. :)

The woman's arms and shoulders should move more. You may want to try using the scale on the bones to help with the perspective as the arm swing (like you may have done for the monster's legs.

http://www.pond5.com/stock-footage/8745 ... -path.html

http://www.pond5.com/stock-footage/1005 ... doors.html

The other comment is that the fog bothers me a bit. I had to study it to figure out why and the main thing is that it is to noisy. What I mean is that there are to many tiny little wisp of clouds. The clouds should be larger/fewer. And the other thing is that the color is a bit to dark. I'd recommend lightening it. Fog is normally white, haze is normally blue or whatever common color the local dust/dirt is. :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2pJwm84 ... re=related
Start at the 5:00 minute mark

You can see the fog begin to show up in front of the characters and then at 5:14 or so there is a great fog scene.
Hi animation world.
Paul Mesken
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Re: NEBULA NINE. Test 4.

Post by Paul Mesken »

This looks nice. The style reminds me a bit of Coop (love his work, I got a "Good'n Plenty" poster of him :) But I do have a couple of comments.

It doesn't really look like the monster is faster than her. The camera move makes it harder to note as well. You could have the camera move with the same speed she has (so she will have the same size in every frame) and the monster appearing from behind, quickly growing in size as he closes in on her. The camera craning up (making her go down in the frame) would also be ominous, showing how small she is and how big the monster is. A upwards tilt would be even better but they are more complex.

Secondly, it doesn't look like she's running very fast. It's more like a leisurely jogging thing. Is she really scared of this monster? If that thing was after me then I would run like Hell! That upright posture is only used by professional runners. Putting the head (and the body) way in front of the center of gravity sells haste.

I don't know whether this shot introduces the monster. If it is (and this shot would be nice for that) then it would be a good idea to first show her running, show her fear (I assume she is scared of the monster). This will raise questions. What is she running from? Why is she scared? Then a dark form appears behind her, growing in size quickly (closing in, the sound and camera tremors getting stronger). We don't see what it is but it is huge (camera moves up with the rising menace, making her descend in the frame) and WHAM! it gets her and then we see that terrible monster (teeths and eyes now revealed, shocking the audience).

Well, that's one way to do it. I don't know the story, preceding shots or whether or not the woman is scared of the monster. But you do know the story and what you want to achieve.
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Durand
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Post by Durand »

Thank's for the feedback. I really appreciate your comments and recommendations. As everyone knows, it is hard to work in isolation and also mantain a level of objectivity. I find this forum an invaluable resource!
So thank you all, and I'll continue to try to improve ( what I describe as) My pathetic fantasy , or should that be pathetic fallacy?....Hey Hothead, this thing is intended to be humorous.
Last edited by Durand on Thu Jun 24, 2010 6:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
sbtamu
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Re: NEBULA NINE. Test 4.

Post by sbtamu »

Paul Mesken wrote:This looks nice. The style reminds me a bit of Coop (love his work, I got a "Good'n Plenty" poster of him :) But I do have a couple of comments.

It doesn't really look like the monster is faster than her. The camera move makes it harder to note as well. You could have the camera move with the same speed she has (so she will have the same size in every frame) and the monster appearing from behind, quickly growing in size as he closes in on her. The camera craning up (making her go down in the frame) would also be ominous, showing how small she is and how big the monster is. A upwards tilt would be even better but they are more complex.

Secondly, it doesn't look like she's running very fast. It's more like a leisurely jogging thing. Is she really scared of this monster? If that thing was after me then I would run like Hell! That upright posture is only used by professional runners. Putting the head (and the body) way in front of the center of gravity sells haste.

I don't know whether this shot introduces the monster. If it is (and this shot would be nice for that) then it would be a good idea to first show her running, show her fear (I assume she is scared of the monster). This will raise questions. What is she running from? Why is she scared? Then a dark form appears behind her, growing in size quickly (closing in, the sound and camera tremors getting stronger). We don't see what it is but it is huge (camera moves up with the rising menace, making her descend in the frame) and WHAM! it gets her and then we see that terrible monster (teeths and eyes now revealed, shocking the audience).

Well, that's one way to do it. I don't know the story, preceding shots or whether or not the woman is scared of the monster. But you do know the story and what you want to achieve.
After watching it a few more times, Paul is right. The woman seems to be out running the monster and BAM, he steps on her. Looks like some simple fixes tho. I look forward to more.
Sorry for bad animation

http://www.youtube.com/user/sbtamu
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Durand
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Post by Durand »

Thanks sbtamu,
Yes, I agree. Most of Pauls and others opinions are correct allthough I'm not certain about Fracturedays comment about the fog. This is set on another planet, maybe fog is blueish there! I'll see if I can soften it a bit and perhaps increase the transparency a tad. One can go on and on fixing these things and I will give it a go, even restaging the action etc as Paul suggested. But, I must point out that this test is only half of the eventual shot, plus there will be a couple of shots preceeding this one . So within that context, this shot as it is may still work. :)
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