Dinosaur Birthday Presents

[willf]

Okay, here's an updated version.








In addition to the box-critter peering out I have also added a few frames with the lid half up, to smooth out the motion of the box itself.

I'm not certain yet, but it seems like the extra frames around the box lid opening give enough of a clue to the action that having the little creature looking out at the fly may be unnecessary. I'll guess I'll wait to see how it looks once there is a soundtrack behind it.
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Another tiny chunk of my movie, "The T Stands For Justice": The presents for a dinosaur birthday party.

[Danimal]

Nice - looks good and quite an unexpected twist!

[Pinesal]

Haha great. Loved the art.

[slowtiger]

Maybe a bit to fast. There's no anticipation, just a uniform movement and then sudden death. The fly could have a rhythm: fly some round, then land on a place for a moment, fly again (good with sound), and so on. The box could lift the lid just a little bit, as in watching the fly, so we know where the action is going to happen.

[willf]

Thanks guys.

s.t., I have sketches where the critter in the box watches the fly, and hides when the fly turns towards it, but I thought it might make the scene too long.

Though now I think about it...

[willf]

I posted the new one up top.

[Danimal]

I liked the eyes, they flashed by so quickly though. Seeing them poke up, maybe even narrow as they plan their next move would be great.

[lwaxana]

I agree with Danimal. If you show the eyes for longer, you can show that the creature is thinking. If you want the eating the fly part to be a surprise, you could make the expression of the eyes mislead the audience. Like maybe the eyes just convey that the creature is curious about what is happening outside of the box and then it eats the fly. We definitely don't know the nature of the creature in there until the eating occurs, so it's still a fun surprise. Overall, this is great! Nice work!